"[Passports] are expensive. I just got one. I have to flee the country soon."
- Matt H.

"My wife would like to let you know that she's better than your wife."
- Garret

(Girl in the background playing darts) "NO! Take that off!!"
Matt: "Whoooa, ok. I'm going home. I'm not into strip darts."
Derek: "I'll be honest. I probably would be."
Matt: "You get one mad person and you're too close to a disaster."

"Cream cheese keeps your insides lubricated."
- Derek